5 PRINCIPLES TO TRANSFORM YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH MONEY
A word of warning – The Financial Wisdom of Ebeneezer Scrooge might make you cry a bit. I would not like to turn this blog into a soap opera, with a lot of sobbing and dramatic stories. That being said, there are certain moments when you meet your own ghosts, to remind you why you started this journey in the first place.
True to the tendency of the last few posts, this one has also a new year’s resolution involved. This time it is about reading a book a month. The first few books were interior design books and healthy eating books. And no, I did not sob over a particular sofa design, or the fact that I need to cut cheese and cold cuts for a while (oh on second thought, that deserves to shed a tear). I finally got my hands on the book I have been waiting for – The financial wisdom of Ebenezer Scrooge.
It is a book which makes you, as if you are led by the ghosts of Christmas Carol, face your limiting beliefs about money. The book guides you going to your own childhood, exactly as Scrooge himself did, to discover which wounds and conclusion did you go through. And how they are harming the present and future sense of fulfilment in life. The book is not aimed only for the ones, who have reached financial stability but still feel miserable, as Scrooge himself. It is for all of us, from different flocks of life, who either felt like a victim, or too godly to think of money, or ashamed of success. For those, who think of richness as sin, and rich people as miserable or sinful.
The book goes back and forth from Dickens’ story to cognitive therapy methods, different examples for dysfunctional money scripts, the authors’ own journey, and practical exercises.
Here comes the crying part – inevitably when you dig into your past for all those painful money related memories, you will find them. And those would be memories of when you felt vulnerable, hurt, ashamed, unappreciated. Or it would be memories of receiving “wisdom” from people you dearly loved, and even though, logically you would know it is incorrect, your loyalty would make it your own belief.
One of the most important conclusions for myself from the book is “many a time, we do not realize our actions are at fault, because they correspond to our beliefs”.
My takeaway from the book
I have built kind of “limiting beliefs measuring device” – I have noticed that whenever I got offended by someone’s suggestion they hit the nail. That is an indicator that my mind and my limiting beliefs are at conflict, and I get wary of the external factor, mirroring that conflict. And that is an indicator I have learned to take note of. If someone tells me, listen that green color will stay very good on your hair, I will just laugh. If the same person implies that I should change my diet to reach my weight goal though, he (or she) better
As a conclusion – this book was a good reminder that life is a journey, that we might fall into old patterns from time to time. It is good to revisit some exercises to strengthen the positive financial beliefs muscle.
There is nothing noble in being superior to some other man. The true nobility is in being superior to your previous self.
— India Proverb
You can check the article “5 personality tests which shaped my life” to see where you can do your money script test. There I share some of my own limiting beliefs. The book came as a blessing, as one particular limiting belief started raising his head from the ashes – and was slowly making his way. I had a problem at the past with “money infidelity”, by trying to avoid sharing information about clothing or any personal moments of indulgence no matter how moderate and reasonable. Now it tried to manifest in a different way and the book came right on time as a reality check. It goes to show that some battles are not won forever, but having the tools and proper guidance, we can keep things at bay.